A Follow-Up

>> Wednesday, July 27, 2011

The post titled "Choices" below has generated the most comments and conversation ever on this blog. 28 people opted to have their comments not posted, rather, sent straight to my personal email or my Facebook email. All but one of those comments were from people my age with divorced parents. I was overcome with the responses of people my age trying to navigate their way through adult life with children, spouses, in-laws, holidays, and all the other aspects that make up life while also adding in the difficult piece of having divorced parents.

The post was simply commentary based on my experience with divorce. A lot has happened since my parents divorced almost ten years ago. Shockingly, some things have become easier while other things have not. My dad remarried and has an almost three year old daughter with his wife. My mom is with a wonderful man and they will be married soon as well. To say my life turned out different than I thought it would is an understatement. To say that I'm not happy with how it turned out is a misinterpretation of my words. As with most things in life, the key is to adapt. In my case, it may take a while. However, when I do accept and understand why something has changed or is different than what I expected, I do so with a full heart and no strings attached.

The Choices post started a meaningful conversation. One person wrote " it's a conversation our society desperately needs to have". I did not write the post in haste. For the first time I asked Ryan if he was OK with me posting it since the post referred to his experience as well. My heart if heavy with one response. I deleted the post for an evening, but I felt that it needed to be re-posted with one correction. Holidays are not "the worst". Holidays are difficult. We all work hard to make the holidays special and pleasant. That does not go unnoticed or unappreciated. I believe family dynamics are hard when people do not know exactly where one is coming from. The post Choices comes from a place of trying to understand, deal, and discuss as well as a place of love for my old, new, and growing family.


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